VERY BRAVE MAN JOKES

VERY BRAVE MAN JOKES

How do you turn a fox into an elephant?*
Marry her! *
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What is the difference between a battery and a woman?*
A battery has a positive side. *
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What are the three fastest means of communication?*
1) Television
2) Telephone
3) Telawoman *
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What should you give a woman who has everything?*
A man to show her how to work it. *
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What do you say to a woman with 2 black eyes?*
Nothing, she's been told twice already. *
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If your wife keeps coming out of the kitchen to nag at you, what have
you* *done
wrong?*
Made her chain too long. *
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How many men does it take to open a beer?*
None.  It should be opened when she brings it. *
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Why do women have smaller feet than men?*
It's one of those 'evolutionary things' that allows them to stand closer to
the kitchen sink. *
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How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart?*
When she starts a sentence with 'A man once told me...' *
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How do you fix a woman's watch?*
You don't.  There is a clock on the oven. *
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Why do men pass gas more than women?*
Because women can't shut up long enough to build up the required pressure. *
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If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the* *front
door, who do you let in first?*
The dog, of course.  He'll shut up once you let him in. *
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What's worse than a Male Chauvinist Pig?*
A woman who won't do what she's told. *
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I married my 'Miss Right'.*
I just didn't know her first name was *Always*. *
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Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes a woman's sex drive by* *90%
...*
it's called a Wedding Cake. *
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Why do men die before their wives?*
They want to
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